best wealthy dating sites - Office dating jokes
" Husband: "Adorable, beautiful, cute, delightful, elegant, fashionable, gorgeous, and hot." Wife: "Aw, thank you, but what about IJK? " A lady goes to the doctor and complains that her husband is losing interest in sex.The doctor gives her a pill, but warns her that it's still experimental.
" quipped her husband, "What did he say about your forty-five year old ass? She answers, "Do you really think I'm going to fire up this big-ass grill for one little weenie?
" She said, "Your name never came up in the conversation." A husband exclaims to his wife one day, "Your butt is getting really big. " Later that night in bed, the husband makes some advances towards his wife who completely brushes him off. " A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom.
" The doctor says, "I’m sorry, we didn’t realize the pill was that strong!
The foundation will be glad to pay for any damages." "Nah," she says, "that's okay. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!
From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just her husband's two.
She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can.
On the day of the wedding, when it comes time for the groom's vows, the pastor looks the young man in the eye and says, "Will you promise to prostrate yourself before her, obey her every command and wish, serve her breakfast in bed every morning of your life, and swear eternally before God and your lovely wife that you will not ever even look at another woman, as long as you both shall live?
" The groom gulps, looks around, and says in a tiny voice, "Yes," then leans toward the pastor and hisses, "I thought we had a deal." The pastor puts a 0 bill into the groom's hand and whispers, "She made me a better offer." A husband, who has six children, begins to call his wife “mother of six” rather than by her first name. A few years down the road, the wife has grown tired of this. Finally, while attending a party with her husband, he jokingly yells out, "Mother of six, I think it's time to go!
I’m about three years into my relationship now and I've started to have erection difficulties.
My girlfriend and I have different ideas as to what the problem is: she bought me some Viagra and I bought her a treadmill.
We're never going back to that restaurant anyway." Bob was in trouble. " The next morning he got up early and left for work.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating